Observations
To be comfortable in your own skin is to make peace with who and what you are, be it: successful or struggling, rich or poor, bright or not-so-much, beautiful or plain, weak or strong, short, bald, fat, or old. Basically, you feel OK about yourself and aren’t ashamed, nor feel any need to apologise to anyone, for anything, about yourself. That makes being comfortable a fundamental source, and/or clear evidence of, transcendent inner strength.
Being comfortable in your own skin contributes to overall well-being and happiness, being built on a base of positive self-image, self-confidence, and self-esteem. Acceptance of self eliminates the need (or unhealthy compulsion?) to compare yourself with others. You have no need to: “Keep up with the Joneses”.
Comfortable individuals don’t need constant personal validation and approval from others – although that’s always nice to receive! They can live authentically – pursuing their own chosen goals and passions without fear of any judgment or rejection by others. They also have better prospects for forming and maintaining healthy relationships, as they don’t demonstrate the sort of excessively needy, insecure, dependent, or dominating behaviours that corrupt and destroy many relationships.
Consequences
People who aren’t comfortable in their own skin often experience a range of negative emotions including anxiety, envy, insecurity, self-doubt, inadequacy, and low self-worth.
They may need constant personal validation and approval from friends, family, peers, colleagues, and others and, if what they perceive they receive is insufficient for their needs, may suffer a range of mental health issues, including depression and profound anxiety.
Learnings
Learning to be comfortable in your own skin generates mental and emotional well-being and enables individuals to be happy with the life they have.
Life Lesson Learnt
Learn to count your blessings, rather than your regrets, and don’t compare yourself to others – there will always be some who appear better off than you, and many more who would swap places with you in a heart beat.
“A fight is going on inside me,” said an old man to his son. “It is a terrible fight between two wolves. One wolf is evil. He is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego. The other wolf is good. he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith. The same fight is going on inside you.”
The son thought about it for a minute and then asked, “Which wolf will win?”
The old man replied simply, “The one you feed.”
~ Wendy Mass